Purity Culture is the outflow of conservative religious teachings that can be found in many religions. In the US context, purity culture flows out of and is continually reinforced by the influence of the evangelical church. This harmful perspective on human sexuality makes women responsible for all things related to sex.
In purity culture, gender expectations are based on a strict, stereotype-based binary. Men are expected to be strong, “masculine” leaders of the household, church, and (to a lesser extent) society. Women are expected to support them—to be pretty, “feminine,” sweet, supportive wives and mothers. -Linda Kay Klein
Women are responsible for anything they feel, think, or do, and are responsible for anything that happens to them in relation to sex. They are also responsible for the thoughts, feelings, emotions, and physical responses of the men around them. Women often learn to hate their bodies early on. The moment they have their first mense, if not earlier, is the moment they become responsible for everyone around them. At the same time, they are also denying that they feel anything at all. This culture is reinforced by adults and other believers. Being perceived as anything less than pure often means being shunned and made fun of by others in the church or Christian culture.
The damage from this kind of environment is often long lasting, impacting everything from body image to finding healthy relationships, from understanding your own sexuality to recognizing abuse dressed up as obedience. The consequences of this kind of teaching are dysfunction, internalized oppression, and a distorted sense right and wrong.
Following on this page are links to different resources about purity culture, complementarianism and egalitarianism, and how to recover. If you have experienced purity culture or know someone that has, I hope this will be a helpful resource for finding your way into a more open, embodied, and whole experience of life.
Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement that
Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free
BY: linda kay klein
One of the definitive books on purity culture is Pure by Linda Kay Klein. She also provides comprehensive definition of Purity Culture here: https://lindakayklein.com/what-is-purity-culture/
“…When she’s not immersing readers into the same world she spent years trying to free herself from, Klein is sharing research, statistics, and anecdotes describing its consequences on people’s lives. …Klein’s jarring reporting is impossible to forget.” – Bust Magazine
Interview with EEWC, Christian Feminism Today - https://eewc.com/linda-kay-klein/
Interview with NPR - https://www.npr.org/2018/09/18/648737143/memoirist-evangelical-purity-movement-sees-womens-bodies-as-a-threat
Two very important books that have just been published
on the culture that surrounds and creates purity culture.
Jesus and John Wayne: How White Evangelicals
Corrupted a Faith and fractured a nation
By: Kristin Kobes Du Mez
“Jesus and John Wayne is a sweeping account of the last seventy-five years of white evangelicalism, showing how American evangelicals have worked for decades to replace the Jesus of the Gospels with an idol of rugged masculinity and Christian nationalism?or in the words of one modern chaplain, with “a spiritual badass.” As Du Mez explains, the key to understanding this transformation is to recognize the role of culture in modern American evangelicalism. Many of today’s evangelicals may not be theologically astute, but they know their VeggieTales, they’ve read John Eldredge’s Wild at Heart, and they learned about purity before they learned about sex―and they have a silver ring to prove it. Evangelical books, films, music, clothing, and merchandise shape the beliefs of millions. And evangelical popular culture is teeming with muscular heroes―mythical warriors and rugged soldiers, men like Oliver North, Ronald Reagan, Mel Gibson, and the Duck Dynasty clan, who assert white masculine power in defense of “Christian America.” Chief among these evangelical legends is John Wayne, an icon of a lost time when men were uncowed by political correctness, unafraid to tell it like it was, and did what needed to be done.”
The making of biblical womanhood:
How the Subjugation of Woman Became Gospel truth
By: Beth Allison Barr
“Biblical womanhood–the belief that God designed women to be submissive wives, virtuous mothers, and joyful homemakers–pervades North American Christianity. From choices about careers to roles in local churches to relationship dynamics, this belief shapes the everyday lives of evangelical women. Yet biblical womanhood isn’t biblical, says Baylor University historian Beth Allison Barr. It arose from a series of clearly definable historical moments.
This book moves the conversation about biblical womanhood beyond Greek grammar and into the realm of church history–ancient, medieval, and modern–to show that this belief is not divinely ordained but a product of human civilization that continues to creep into the church. Barr’s historical insights provide context for contemporary teachings about women’s roles in the church and help move the conversation forward.
Interweaving her story as a Baptist pastor’s wife, Barr sheds light on the #ChurchToo movement and abuse scandals in Southern Baptist circles and the broader evangelical world, helping readers understand why biblical womanhood is more about human power structures than the message of Christ.”
Beth Allison Barr and Kristin Du Mez recently had a conversation about their books and touched on how they intersect purity culture. You can find that here.
Other Books
#ChurchToo: How Purity Culture Upholds Abuse and How to Find Healing by Emily Joy Allison and Lyz Lenz - Telling the stories of abuse in the church and how the culture of shame and purity aids in that abuse.
Shameless by Nadia Bolz Weber - An upfront, uncompromising look at sex and faith. Bolz-Weber looks at scripture from an educated perspective and helps clear out the bad theology that has dominated this discussion for far too long.
Virgin Nation: Sexual Purity and American Adolescence by Sara Moslener - A historical look at the development of purity culture and the way it intersects with American culture at large.
Women Experiencing Faith by Janel Apps Ramsey - A collection of essays from women from different Christian traditions. The book includes a range of stories, many of which address issues of purity culture, embodiment, and what it means to be female.
Web Links
How an Abstinence Pledge in the 90s Shamed a Generation of Evangelicals
How An Evangelical Dating Guide And Purity Culture Gave Me An Anxiety Disorder
How Evangelical Purity Culture Can Lead to A Lifetime of Sexual Shame
I'm saving myself for God: True stories from evangelical purity culture
My Body Kept Score - What Purity Culture Didn’t Know About Trauma
Purity culture harmed thousands of evangelical teens; what did the Church get wrong about sex?
Reddit Thread on Evangelicals and Recovering from Purity Culture
Their Generation Was Shamed by Purity Culture. Here's What They're Building in Its Place
Podcast Episodes
The Bible for Normal People with Linda Kay Klein
Purity, Trauma, Healthy Sex Education with Lindsey Lockett
Exvangelical - The Purity Culture Episodes
Where Do We Go From Here - Purity Culture and Trauma
Healing From Purity Culture
Healing often comes from reading, listening, and sharing stories. But purity culture theology and the stuff that often comes with it, often needs to be addressed more specifically. Following are some books that can help you on the journey. If you find you need more help, please seek out a licensed counselor. There are now counselors that specialize in religious trauma. They can be very helpful in navigating this journey to wholeness.
Faith Shift by Kathy Escobar - This book deals with deconstruction in general but is a good starting place
Sacred Wounds: A Path to Healing From Spiritual Trauma by Teresa Pasquale - Examples, discussions, and practices to help you heal from church trauma.
Come As You Are: Revised and Updated: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski - A book to help you re-teach yourself about your body, how it works, what the parts do, and all the things that can influence your sex life. Not specifically spiritual, but a way to relearn and get more comfortable in your body.
I Am My Body: A Theology of Embodiment by Elisabeth Moltmann-Wendel - A Christian theological work on women and embodiment.
The Body is Not An Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love by Sonya Renee Taylor - This books opens the doors to empowerment and embodiment. Learning to reconnect with your body after purity culture can be a long and difficult road. This book makes that a little easier.
Grown-Woman Theology by Brittney Cooper - Dr. Cooper wrestles with White Evangelical Purity Culture and her own Black Feminist Theology. A beautifully written article that illuminates the complexity around messages of sex and sexual purity.